out on the bay

I

though i must exhort to you

do not let your grudges

bury yourself at sea.




through the redwoods

the separation of time was divided

between the birds and convoluted memories



between the woods


within the fog


the eyes within


were filching

the last remnants of my soul.





mimesis.


let us take it.



let us migrate into our own

paradise which we have so eloquently designed


and into eternity we shall conflate


forming a future of our own

for generations to reflect and admire.





Prisms


we are all prisms



so let us show our color


from the sun


and the rest shall follow.





there is no metonymy

for all the love which you have given me


and the love which i had shared.



ii.



oh shadow


oh mimesis


oh abstractions of the past



your footprints are only following mine



deep through these woods in comfort


to confront the future.





this melancholia of mine

has sailed far away into

this dense fog where i

dare not follow its lanterns

where no man can no longer see….




what was this moment for?

bottled up


mind passim



the stars only became void


knowing we are all the same

we refuse to gaffer

in our woes for we know



Eons from now the stars


will finally see our radiance


and in favor return their love


in full luminosity.




iii.


serendipity.


as like the flickering of the stars


light has finally reached me




serenity.


sitting on this rock


observing all of the bay


I wince to myself



as my sorrows

as my nimiety of regrets

all become washed away.




oh seagull.

where do the seagulls go

when they get lonely…




iv.



these lines


are fragmented pieces

put together.




no future


no past

no present.




here in these cosmos they are one of the same.




your smile


your eyes


your laughter



they keep me alive throughout the night


as you gallop freely through my head



enjoying what we are

enjoying what we will be



meditating on this old rock of mine

the world awakens

and i am ready to rise

This was posted 3 weeks ago. It has 2 notes.

San Francisco 2014 - A farewell letter

Traveling north
I am only thinking of you
I am only ignoring these lights
Reflecting on the cascading landscape
Knowing that we truly had a time
 
Ignoring the world around me
I am dancing with you
Purely fixated on your smile
Wishing that this moment will never end
 
But it has to
As it always does
But again we refuse to stop our feet
 
And we move with our wings
Into new memories to admire
Together
Forever
 
Why do we destroy ourselves
In the darkness when
In the light there is too much to love
 
 
 
Reflections
Reflections
Reflections
 
 
Through our prisms
We project such an array
Of beauty
When we play the songs of
Our heart
 
 
Though we move from our
Past of other worlds
I look to you as
A radiant future.
 
 
Poetry of the past
Makes us stronger
 
Poetry of the past
Makes us into color
 
 
These streets of the past
As the memories that once were
Oscillate through my fragmented mind
 
Again and again I am reminded
As I quest through this city of fog
That I am very lucky to be alive
 
 
A man of many middle names
I have lived
And now I realize I am ready
To accept the grace that
Has always been with me
 
 
 
 
You were standing in the shadows
At the station watching
my every move
Watching me transcended in dance
Watching me blooming with spring
And in the shadows
I was secretly fixated on your smile


 ////////
 
 
I took you to the top of the stairs
To show the world given to us

Somewhere you were always everywhere  
 
And I am reminded
That you were a gift to my heart
 
On this foggy ride to the sea
I pedal as hard to try and focus
On the future that almost
Left me astray
 
 
Every year it seems
That my arms open
Where I am
Made brand new
 
Ignoring all the false
Discrepancies
thrown at me
 
Which alluded to
My fabricated satisfaction
that i did not allow to weigh me down
 
 

I am factual
I am real
 
 
And in this city
I was simply a ghost
Observing the kaleidoscope
Which this wonder of a place projected
 
 
This is a simple poem
Which covers time
Which we all thought existed
But maybe they never did ….
 
Out on this starry night I stare out into the bay putting together the many pictures which I chose to throw away


/////  


You are wonder
Oh San Francisco
As you mend
Such rich mysteries
As you mend
Such glittering radiance
 
 
Moths to flames
We all are
Men to city lights
We all are
 
Washing the day
To relish
With the lust of night
 
 
As we ignore our fragility
We accept our stupidity
For in a way we all wish to die
With living a life of 1000 men
 
That is our destruction
That is our acceptance
 
With this city


//////

And with you
alone
in light
in song
in this world

I realize

I no longer need a place
Such as San Francisco


For with you
I am free
I am in bloom

//////

This was posted 3 weeks ago. It has 4 notes.

seattle (2013)

an advent of greed

which i held to

gather together a city

which comes so alive at night




but i was wrong


for this appeared to be


another holocene that has passed


another era which i became flooded


in my own mistakes







this was the beginning of the end for me


as i glanced off for miles into the distance


stirred and shaken between how this year would go




and months later


i didn’t know it would start like this….








the emerald city



such an odd place



in the midst of january



in the midst of winter




in the midst of the snowfall






the city is alive


the city is barren



the city is ready for the first days of spring





as so was i











for my mind was dormant


not knowing how it would sprout






a simple little seed i was



trying to figure how to grow



trying to figure how to form




into someone new














though one night in the streets


i did realize that


i had something special




i had myself



i had others





and for a moment



there was her who carried me down the street



as i was inebriated beyond comprehension








for amongst the dull grey skies



it was so strange to feel alive



but dead at the same time….












rain and rain and rain and rain


i stacked these stacks upon each other



awaiting for them to tumble












2013 






as i wrote of it before





it started off strange





it started off right







for as i reflect on these times









this odd trilogy became


a dark masterpiece



of time












these were the memories


which i have so written


at 4 in the morning





in which they were all fabricated




but now they became real…..












from the cascades to california






i took the train ride






which i have always dreamed of




which i have always fabricated in my mind









but it was with one


whom forever ago




i would write about




imagining she existed










and in truth







i was blindsided










and that was indeed the advent of my destruction


and that was indeed the advent of my greed










for as i admit




i was lost







i was simply a lump

in the road




as the cars


as the bikes


as the people



so nonchalantly ran over



















to you



i apologize




what happened a month later















for i was lost



and i accept this advent of destruction


























but as that seed which i wrote


so many countless times



began to sprout











and here i am again







renewed














seattle






a city of true acceptance








seattle






a city of true craft










the smell of beans in the morning


reminded me of the times of

san francisco


as i knew affection


was being so tenderly crafted



because everyone is looking out


for each other








and that is how it should be……







but at the time i refused to accept it





in my repeated advent of greed












for you



for you





for you












my destruction was always for you






















as that train rolled through in the midst of the night



i slowly watched the ice build


i slowly watched the flakes fall



i slowly closed my eyes as your hand rested in mine













now in this moment


i am embarrassed to say




i threw this all away






because i wanted more


when in reality i knew i shouldn’t








but i didn’t give a fuck

at this hour of mine







and out that door i rushed

not looking back


when i knew that



she was looking at me



….















down that hole i fell







pass the memories of seattle











into my own hell















but up i sprouted














and again and again








i became something new








as that snow melted











and spring came around me





















……………….













did i mean what i said

when i wanted to say goodbye?








did you mean what you said


when you said goodbye?









/.…….»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»



































































seattle

























seattle





























seattle


























…………


























i am blessed


























……..


























i am grateful

























…….

























i am accepted

























……

























i welcome this advent


for it is all i have








i welcome this soul of mine




for it is all i have









i welcome you



for it is all i have












again


this year is dedicated for you









though you may never read these lines






this year was always dedicated for you









and i am sorry that i tried to destroy it




for as i jump in-between the future

and

for as i jump in-between the past




i see my mistakes



and


i see my acceptance
























…….

























seattle


























…….


























the cascades

























….

























portland

























……

























sacramento

























……

























san francisco

























…..


























los ángeles

























…….

























i’ve seen it all



with you by my side








and again







i accept this






for though i may be a futile device






you have always been such a blessing





//////




seattle






such a gem to be admired


the venus of the world         
 you preserve love in so many ways                   
and as i seek hope                    
you heal my troubled mind                          
 oh emerald                            
cloak me in wisdom         
cloak me in hope            
 cloak me in tranquility




heal my heart


amongst the moon



and through the rain




let me grow



let me grow




let me grow




////////












on the water



i gaze at the blue heron




wondering next



where it’s flight might be






wondering next





where my next flight might be






wondering



where she might be










oh blue heron







if you see her









tell her i am sorry













////
























seattle









oh city by the sea






construct me






let me go

let me grow


into a man that shines such light





///////








i’ve spent so many hours

lost in bed







attempting to fall in love



all over


all over again




wishing for this renewal


amongst my advent of destruction


amongst my advent of greed







but in the end



we need to look pass



the weeds




and accept the green




for it holds



for it possesses true life





for that is where it all grows






//////////









emerald










////////////













shine for me







//////////












seattle











/////////////////////


















i accept you




and indeed






you were the foundation of this year







////////













let us move onto 2014






and eons from now





i shall return









and





eons from now









into your





eyes








i will smile







////////















seattle


////////////












how did we come to this?





//////////












.

This was posted 4 months ago. It has 0 notes.

detroit (2013)


i wish i could

speak the truth




but i never can




i wish i could


exert my true self




but i never can








in this city i see much life


amongst the death





i see love amongst so


much hate











everyone


wants to see detroit die




but it never will




because i won’t let it.












a marvelous building i witness




only to learn it was


burnt to pieces the next day





(oh how the art we love can vanish without warning)






Detroit was burning


as everyone nestled themselves


on the couch hiding behind


their computers


their TVs

.









she was there beside me

wondering through these streets

gazing above at what once was





a golden palace


but now it is now only a shell


as the rust is eating it inside.







this is my city



but i cannot live here



but i cannot live here






there are no trains

(only cars)



there are no bikes


(for the roads are torn)




but this is my city


and i am in love it












you deserve to be loved





but you won’t allow it




and time passes on….





and we pass on





into blurs




which we pretend



that we never had









.







but i do love you



and you know this






and you will always know this






and with that




when there is darkness




when there is light







i will be by your side




because






you deserve to be loved







and with the memories


and with the times



and with the adventures





i am grateful to say



that i met you




and you met me








but as with this city



we have constructed


an irreparable life








but as you know




i will forever be by your side









though we are both  broken


our friendship is unassailable



and again and again



i am grateful




that i met you









detroit





a city of perseverance






a city of integrity







out of the ashes


they are indeed the phoenix











hamtramck


what a wonder you are





heidelberg



what a wonder you are










what a wonder we are












never




sell your masterpieces




never





for the strokes of geniuses

which you display with pride


has inspired many generations






including me








//









as my hands were in my pockets


gazing above



i sometimes wonder



where we will be




years from now……









will we find others to be with?






and who exactly will they be?





and why did we choose this life?







this is simply a

waltz #2 



which we play over and over




this is simply a

waltz #2



which we leave on mute









detroit












i am grateful to discover


discoveries which i never knew existed







i refuse to believe the lies they tell about you











as the snow began to fall

i only smiled


knowing you were there by my side




and as we sat on those sunken streets


smearing our canvases to death


arranging our hearts





the sun went around us 1000 times


as we refused to bulge



as we were perfecting our manifesto.






around and around


our shadows went


as we accompanied


 the rotation of the earth




and into my mind


a memory emerged

//

when i kissed you

//


and you simply

//


rode away


//




and


that was the last time i saw you



















//













in the street i drew a portrait of you



so i can be remembered



by your week of happiness





as all around me



the roses began to bleed





and the entire city began to paint


and laugh with the moon…..







we shared these stories


in which we never knew existed before



//









there was a time

we had a time













was that you yesterday?


 when i thought i gazed into your eyes

and you looked away….







a genesis to my apocalypse



i will never witness your smile again





so we leave

in an image of flumes

from where i try to make you out in the sky






//





what is it worth


when you told me not to look



and simply wonder away in hopes



that this automaton of me



would produce something of perfection…..





//






let us not divulge into


what needs to not be said





but reside….




the growth from the soil


of the seeds we so tenderly sow and toil


to grow into a beautiful thing….



let us not divulge into such hate


but exclaim a feeling a of true….








you are


you are



you are



 a great being and i possess no


shame to let you know….




i want this soil to treat you well

and together we shall grow beyond our

expectations….











so carelessly do we


throw away our minds



to synthetic beings




to only be chewed away



by beasts of lies……










detroit






my heart was formed



in your presence








detroit




i found true love


in your presence








detroit




these hands were crafted



in your presence
















generations come and generations go




and no longer do the generations of my blood




exist in your presence











and i am sad









but i will not let you die




oh city of mine







but i will let you thrive




oh love of mine














detroit








you brought me light






and throughout eternity





(under the decay)





you will forever shine













.

This was posted 4 months ago. It has 2 notes.

station to station



rothko

        began to paint the sky



as time began to turn away


as the shadows crept by us

as the trains kept pounding

against the ragged steel.





            

                    here i am




here i am





here i am conflicted between

on what my future shall be….





reflected off the monoliths


reflected off the sounds of beauty




there came an amplification

in a golden strum of acoustics.






station        to            station

        station to station


they sing….






art and ingenuity crafted by hand



as they roll from nation to nation



in honor of the ones who pave these lands


with true beauty.






though

we become carried


away in our own need to find life




there shall forever be that light



which we hold in our hearts.








i’ve been in love too many times



i’ve been in constant confliction

too many times



for now i am my own
                light


and i am not ashamed….








my eyes become shut


and a ufo began to hover

from the distance


where i embrace this mirrored sea


of these made fantasies

and our augmented reality.






the mind falls into the void

which i attempt to catch


but all my mnemonic ideals fade….





whiskey and weed on my breath


it is interesting to find my own self


finding these paths to


become content…..








it isn’t your fault



it isn’t your fault




it isn’t your flat



because here in these mountainous lands



i can smile freely





as if bernini chiseled this moment himself….







i am caught in my own satisfactory serenity


where i could forever vanish and be happy



as these shitstorms roll in

as these shitstorms roll out




we cry

we scream


we reach out for that light


to share because

absolute loneliness

will be my absolute death.





I do not deny death


i merely accept it

because i’ve already attempted

to meet it many times before.






in this moment

i embrace this

equinox where love

is at it’s closest






and months from now


i will embrace this


solstice


where love


is at it’s distant.







let me burn





let me freeze






let me grow





let me wilt







let me love




let me parish













ignore these images


which you put into your mind






for they are true




for they are false







for they are light







for they are darkness









for they are music







for they are silence










for they are you







for they are you









for they are you











station to station




station to station









station to station












you brought me appreciation

to yourself







you brought me a tribute


to yourself






you brought yourself


to yourself







we carried ourselves from

to station to station

.

This was posted 4 months ago. It has 0 notes.